memories vs a future

i loved to be a kid . yea maybe i'm not anymore but do you ever think that sometimes i was childish ? i love to be a kid . a time full of happiness . all i know are plays...plays...and plays . no study . a child-times are funny . when i felt that its like i won't let it go .
a time when i could play anything all time .
a time when i was thinking...life are only about toys, doll, and chocolate .
a time when i've never met someone called problems before .
a time when i cried caused my friends physically ... not about heart as now usually happen.
a time when i always happy...everytime
a time when i've never felt sad... i'm just CRYING ... not SAD




sometimes i wanna back to this time ...

(this is the little me . sorry... a little bit edit . only the light and contras so the picture look brighter)

i wanna come back to that time . i love to play just same with kids usually do . i'm not believe it ... i'm thirteen now . i've been live so long .
sometimes i hate to called a teen . factually i still wanna be a child .
i wish i could back to be a baby than grow again until 7th than will be back again in form of a baby and....yea like a circulation .
but what can i do ? the reality i'm a teen now and not a child anymore as i want .
however i must be ready for a true-life . a life which full of tears , laughs , smiles , sadness , happiness , and love ... not life which full with chocolates and candies .

actually i'm not ready yet . i still want to play as long as i want . i'm not ready for a life . life's too hard and i'm too young . honestly i'm afraid ... to feel a sadness . honestly i'm afraid to waste my tears caused hurting by love . i just wanna get my happiness and i've got it in a soul of a-child-me . why must i grow up ? why don't i stay as a baby...while i could always get happiness from it ?

when i saw my parents and...others family , i want the time to runnin' faster .
yea sometimes i want to be a woman quickly .
i want to wear my wedding-dress ... hold on my husband's arms...
i want to built my own house ... stay there with my new family :)
hugs and kisses my children ...
help my husband to wear his tie ...
see how beautiful my daughter ... as her mother does
see how handsome my son ... as his father does
read some fairy tales for my beloved children ...

hahaha i wanna feel that ! :)
i know ... that won't be happen if i'm just stay forever as a child ...


actually I DON'T WANNA BE A CHILD FOREVER . I JUST WANT TO BACK TO THAT TIME SOMETIMES ...
and now ... just let the time flow where it'll bring us to :)